So so blessed!

It is 3:01am and I cannot sleep, it is the best I have felt all day and the first time the boys have been able to sleep for more than a 30 minute interval. I did the dishes which I now do about 4 times a day. I cannot believe how much they have grown. Phillip doesn't fit into the sleepers he used to, he is too long for them. He is so much longer than Dawson when I am burping him he kind of flops around with his long legs dangling about. Dawson is also starting to fit snugly into his sleepers that used to be so long on him. They are so different now it is very easy to tell them apart, I even know who's crying when I hear it. I think now that having one baby would be a piece of cake. Twins are so much work. I believe we are really lucky, yet at times I feel very frustrated and I wonder how anyone with children get anything done. Dawson and Phillip are on the same eating schedule and I have only had to feed them at the same time by myself once and it really is hard. You have to prop one baby up and just pray they will be comfortable eating like that, while you hold the bottle in one's mouth with one hand and the other bottle in the other hand. Then burping is a challenge you kind of prop the bottle up and hope the other baby doesn't go crazy.

On new year's eve I went into the hospital because my c-section incision was leaking. We were told all kinds of horrible wrong information. Andy was with me the entire time and I was so grateful, the doctors were telling us bad news and it ended up all wrong and I was much better off than they thought. My mom was alone with the babies for almost two days straight! I really cannot thank her enough and tell her how much it meant to me that she did that for me and my family. She was rescued by my co-worker Jennifer, who later called in Jackie, our personal twins expert. It was hard for me to be away from my babies for so long. It seemed I just got them and now I couldn't be with them and I felt helpless. Here are these wonderful friends and my mom taking care of my babies and I can't even help. I also had to except the fact we needed help and we had to rely on my friends like never before. Jennifer was a godsend. She came over stayed until she had to work, then came back over. She also came the next day. I couldn't believe the kindness I experienced from my co-workers. Becci and her husband Rick came to the hospital and prayed for me, which really meant allot, and comforted me so much. Kam Yee and Matt came and visited and brought some cheery flowers. My mom got a break and was able to come for a night. I think she needed the rest really badly, she crawled in the bed with me and was out like a light! My wonderful husband was by my side as much as he could be, and I don't know how he stood it. He would just sit by my side while I was in and out of sleep from the pain medication. I would wake up and he would be looking at me or holding my hand, I felt like the most lucky person in the world to have such a wonderful person in my life. I needed him more than ever and he was right there, that feeling is indescribable. I got to leave the hospital after 5 days and well I have less faith than ever before in the medical profession. I am grateful for nurses and scared of doctors!

Overall I feel very blessed and loved! Dawson and Phillip have all ready brought so much into my life and made me come to realizations that I had never experienced. I am in love with my babies and so so lucky to have my mom and Andy!